Do you ever feel like you aren’t giving your family enough? Maybe you recognize your own pattern of technology use is getting in the way of meaningful connections with your kids. Or perhaps, you just question if they really know how much you love them.
These thoughts are fairly common. You are not alone! Parents everywhere are struggling with the increasing number of hats they must wear daily, and trying to find a way to relax and de-stress themselves.
So what can you do to quiet those thoughts about not giving enough, not creating meaningful interactions, or not showing them how you truly feel?
I’m glad you asked… The great news is that you can easily make conscious choices to show your kids that you love and adore them, every day. Choose one or two things off of this list and incorporate it daily or weekly for a while and see how you and your child feel. After a while add in one or two more things from the list. Go slow and do not overwhelm yourself with expectations. Have fun and enjoy your special moments!
9 simple things you can do to show your kids that you love and adore them.
Hug them every day - Kids, especially younger ones, need physical touch to experience love and affection. Make sure that you give your kiddos a good quality hug at least once a day.
Create a special routine. - This doesn’t have to be something expensive or hours long. Have a special bedtime routine, weekly family night, or monthly outing. Anything that you and your child decide you enjoy doing together regularly is a special routine. Just make sure that you tell your child this is something special!
Remind them that you love and support them…even when they mess up. Making mistakes is part of growing up. It can be frustrating, especially when you’ve reminded them many times about something. However, kids need to know that you are there for them, no matter what.
Put down electronics when you are listening. - Ask them specific questions about their day, their friends, and interests, and then listen. Not nod and agree as you scroll. Put the electronics down, make eye contact, listen and have a real conversation with them. Try to do this daily.
Show up to activities. - Children love when their special adults show up to watch them play and perform. Make sure that you show up to the majority of their activities, take interest and discuss these activities with them. Show them that their activities are important to you too!
Encourage and join in their creativity. - Read books with no words, make up stories, pretend play, and create games to play together.
Tell them you are proud of them. - This includes both small and large reasons to be proud. It is easy to remember to tell your child that you are proud of them for putting their dishes in the sink. It’s harder to remember (and sometimes more uncomfortable) to tell your child you are proud of how they are maturing, improving in their attitude, or growing toward their future. It may be more difficult but it is still vitally important.
Set clear boundaries. - Kids love structure, routine, and boundaries. They will of course try to argue many of these points, but they secretly crave them. Make sure your child knows the rules they are expected to follow and the consequences of breaking those rules.
Respect their stages. - As kids get older they will probably want less physical touch, may fight boundaries more, and cringe at your words of encouragement and love. Don’t stop and don’t give up. Remember that kids grow and change just like adults. It’s hard for parents to be ok with these things, but respecting their stages will communicate love and respect.
Showing authentic love, affection, and attention to your child doesn't need to be something you stress over. Take your time, be genuine and go outside of your comfort zone. I believe in you!
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